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February 3rd, 2008

musings before bed

you know, it's been a long time since i played around in a fandom.  my last journal entry from my old juliaabra days was in 2004 and by then i'd pretty much dropped out anyway (oh buffy how i miss ya).  so it's been fun getting back into the fandom swing and seriously gettin gmy geek on.  it's interesting posting comments and wondering if anyone'll reply to them since no one knows me and there's that strange bnf-ness to fandom.  and it's not even bnf-ness really.  it's this weird thing like: ok, say you're at a cafe and you overhear some people talking about something you really like or maybe even know something about, and you decide all right, i'm just gonna say something even though it's not my conversation and so you do and rather than have the conversation expand to include you you get some strange looks and maybe an uncomfortable laugh thrown in your general direction.   not to say that i've ever done that but, ahem, being on lj, trolling around, reading journals, and posting is kinda like that.  i guess it comes down to looking for connection.  and knowing that even online it takes time and effort to make those connections.   and that's all right.  but it is a little strange--i've left random bits of my thoughts all over the place and i keep checking to see if anyone's biting.  i really relish the few conversations i've gotten into here so those of you who are responding please know you're really, truly appreciated.  it's great fun for me to know i'm not alone in my geekiness.


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